Dead Static Drive Review

It occurred to me as I fired up Dead Static Drive that the last time I played a game with an equally long and storied development history, it also started with a road trip. In my review of Final Fantasy XV I noted my surprise that despite 10 years of development the end product was something thoroughly playable and relatively cohesive (with mullets to boot), but unfortunately I cannot say the same about Dead Static Drive on either of those counts. While the size of the studios makes that comparison a little unfair, after more than 10 years of waiting for Dead Static Drive to finally see the light of the day, the end product is a buggy, aimless mess that needs at least another decade in the oven.

Shit’s on fire yo

My confusion with the game began immediately. Waking up in my apartment, there is someone at the door demanding I give them money. I have to find my car keys and slip out the back, but I notice in the dresser there is a sniper rifle and bullets (where else would you keep those?). I dutifully slip out the back but am curious as to what the person banging on my door will do when I confront him anyway. It turns out he does nothing, and when I proceeded to shoot him dead, I then revived him by holding a button and he told me to be careful out there. Thanks mate.

Things really didn’t pick up from there either. Most of what DSD has you do is drive, which makes sense given the game’s title but is not a good experience nonetheless. Employing an isometric viewpoint that you can rotate ninety degrees at a time to give you a better look at your surroundings and navigate the many bends, every car you drive handles like a beluga-shaped slab of butter, and you can’t go off road for fear of damaging your car. Birds also fly into your car and damage it quite often so have fun with those too. Cars need fuel too, but luckily every drop of the stuff seems to be quite free in the world of DSD, so all you have to do is grab a fuel pump, navigate an awful inventory system and fill up. For a world that I think is supposed to be a post-apocalyptic cosmic horror nightmare, free fuel kind of makes it seem like paradise to me considering petrol prices right now.

Even if the driving is bad (and it is), surely the environments are interesting given the game’s marketing? Again, no. Everything has a bland, washed-out sterile feel to it that makes the whole thing feel disjointed and pointless. This is partially alleviated by some Lovecraftian leanings in the art direction that you’ll stumble across as you make your way through the world, particularly at night or dusk. In terms of what you actually do though, most objectives simply have you driving from one place to the next, with vague objectives and unexplained events occurring around you with little idea of what any of it means and why you should care. You pick up random people along the way as you traverse the lifeless roads, with the only highlight being the occasional sighting of a headcrab zombie-type apparition and perhaps some text-based car chatter in between loading screens. It’s dull, it’s aimless, and it’s impossible to engage with.

Midwest America Drift

Maybe things are better when you get out of your car and roam around a bit? I can assure you they are not. Getting out of your car the camera zooms in to a ludicrous extent, making it difficult to discern your surroundings. This includes even making out the enemies that attack you randomly, and engaging in melee or gun-based combat is clunky, confusing and dissatisfying. I avoided it entirely as much as I could, as the game gives you little reason to bother with it, and even if you arm your posse to the teeth they are useless and die easily.

This is not to mention the bugs, with one such bug mercifully ending my time with DSD prematurely as it broke the game. Bugs include the camera zooming in and out when you try and talk to people that make it hard to select conversation options, party members getting stuck on walls and bits of scenery constantly, and quests failing to complete (when you can figure out what you’re even supposed to interact with) requiring a restart. When I restarted the game, and found that my last save had me wedged up against a bed with my party boxing me in and not allowing me to move for love nor money, I knew it was time to say goodbye. With no means of loading an earlier save, and the idea of spending hours getting back to that point from the beginning of the game being unpalatable, I walked away.

This is where the journey ends

Final Thoughts

In its current state, DSD does not work. First impressions are woeful, with a world that does little to introduce itself or give any sense of personality or place. Every mechanic, from driving, to managing inventory, to combat, is antithetical to a good time. Perhaps beyond where DSD forced me to put it down the game finds its drive (heh), but if my experience was anything to go by then this is unlikely.

Reviewed on Xbox Series X // Review code supplied by publisher

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