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Jorts

Tight In The Jorts: August 2023 Edition

Silly Season kicks off

August 1 – Celeste (Xbox Series X|S)

August 2 – Atomic Heart: Annihilation Instinct (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/PC)

August 3 – Baldur’s Gate 3 (PC/Mac)

August 8 –  WrestleQuest (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/PC)

August 10 – Stray (Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One)

August 10 – Stray Gods: The Roleplaying Musical (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/Switch/PC)

August 15 – Moving Out 2 (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/Switch/PC)

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August 15 – Everspace 2 (PS5/Xbox Series X|S)

August 16 – En Garde! (PC)

August 17 – Vampire Survivors (Switch)

August 18 – The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/PC)

August 18 – Bomb Rush Cyberfunk (Switch/PC)

August 22 – Guild Wars 2: Secrets of the Obscure (PC)

August 22 – Immortals of Aveum (PS5/Xbox Series X|S/PC)

August 25 – Armored Core 6: Fires of Rubicon (  )

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August 29 – Sea of Stars (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/Switch/PC)

August 29 – Goodbye Volcano High (PS5/PS4/PC)

August 30 – Daymare 1994: Sandcastle (PS5/PS4/Xbox Series X|S/Xbox One/Switch/PC)

Interminable white woman and solid lyricist Taylor Swift once wrote of August that it “sipped away like a bottle of wine” and while that’s all very nice, I’d still rather this year slow down a little. August kicks off our silly season, an absolute landslide of titles to consume the rest of the year and ensure any GOTY debates will likely be dominated by the resigned sighs of the restless and the timeless. Christ, now I’m getting flowery – anyway, how about those Rubiconion fires?

James

Bit of a shotgun blast to the face of obscure shit for me this month with a healthy smattering of unique and strange indies catching my eye. Locally brewed Stray Gods: The Roleplaying Musical has made a name for itself on the international market thanks to its utterly absurd cast and ambitious premise of a musical you can actually control, a pretty big claim I can’t wait to see play out. Sea of Stars marks the first time a game will be dropping on both Xbox and PlayStation’s library services on launch day, an already fascinating market move, even before you factor in how cool the game itself looks. Under the Waves is another industry oddity, with Quantic Dream taking the publisher reins of this gorgeous deep sea grief expedition.

Getting even stranger actually, The Man Came Around and Nosebound took me completely by surprise. No clue if the game is named after the song but assumedly a man is going to be coming around in this striking tale of politics, morally dubious choices and sim-lite resource management. Nosebound, another black and white stylised affair actually, is riffing on old school point and click titles with a supernatural twist. And Baldur’s Gate III had a trailer dedicated to bear fucking so I dunno, I feel like that can hang with the strange ones this month. 

Everspace 2 is launching on consoles at last too; I still shudder to think of the time I tried to play that wonderfully dense space sim on my aging PC and definitely started melting something. But we all know where I’m disproportionately filling my Jorts this month – Armored Core VI: Fires of Rubicon is FromSoftware’s first game since Elden Ring and it’s a doozy. A high speed, impenetrably difficult mech combat series that takes the best of the developer’s cold, detached storytelling and pairs it with blistering, deeply customisable battle robots…baby, you’ve got a stew going.

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Jordan

Oh boy, here comes a massive month for me. Two of my most anticipated games of the year are releasing, but there are also quite a few others that have me quite happy this month and will hopefully pull me away from Destiny 2 for long enough to momentarily forget how Bungie continually runs that game into the ground. Regardless, let’s go from the top.

At heart, I’m a huge fan of RPGs, and nothing satiated that hunger for the next expansive and intricate RPG experience more than the impending release of Baldur’s Gate III. I’ll be honest, I’ve already played more than I care to admit of the game’s early access, but in an age where RPGs are mostly just boring open world games with stats or arbitrary skill trees *glares at Horizon Forbidden West*, a game that genuinely understands what the role-playing part of a role-playing game is cannot be missed. Larian Studios had already captured me with the two Divinity: Original Sin games, but this is just icing on the cake.

Onto some other, less serious (tonally speaking) games, Moving Out 2  and Bomb Rush Cyberfunk look like they will be a lot of fun. As someone that has been incredibly sad that Jet Set Radio Future isn’t exactly playable, Bomb Rush Cyberfunk is going to hopefully quell some of that sadness. And now we are back to big releases with Guild Wars 2 Secrets of the Obscure. I have thoroughly enjoyed every Guild Wars 2 expansion as ArenaNet feels like the only MMO dev that has proper ambition with each release and aren’t just releasing more of the same. Does that mean everything lands as well as I would like? No, but I appreciate the game more for that. Now I know nothing about Immortals of Aveum outside of its insane recommended specifications for PC and the fact that it’s like a first-person shooter magic game? I don’t know, but I like magic so we’ll see.

FromSoftware, I’m still recovering from your immense release of Elden Ring just under a year ago, while also lamenting the fact that Sony will keep one of your best games forever tied down to their frustrating platform (look I don’t like the PS5 that much). Now you’re telling me that you already have a new game in the form of Armored Core VI: Fires of Rubicon? Well…shit. I’m extremely excited to see how a modern day FromSoftware adapts to a different style of gameplay since the advent of Dark Souls and Elden Ring’s success. GIVE IT TO ME NOW.

Mark

There’s going to be a lot of people talking about Armored Core VI: Fires of Dark Souls But Mechs, and for good reason. You can’t question FromSoftware’s legacy, but you might just be pondering whether Miyazaki’s winning streak can translate back to a bolder, more modern setting after so many years away from the franchise. There’s no monsters or ancient magic to speak of here, but as a fan of giant killer robots who has never touched the series before, I can’t help but be intrigued. If it has the right balance between crunchy combat and dynamic boss battles, I think I’m sold.

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But, and it is a big but, there are a ton of highly anticipated indies hitting this month that have sat on my watch list for what feels like forever. Armored Core may get all the attention, however, that shouldn’t take away from what could very well be some elite, narrative driven adventures. WrestleQuest and Goodbye Volcano High hold plenty of promise in that regard, two titles that will hopefully deliver some enjoyable storytelling across two very different, very unique tales. If you’re a fan of wrestling or want an emotional journey of teens facing the end of the world, keep a close eye on these two. Oh, and shoutout to En Garde!, a title that snuck up on me just recently that’s looking mighty promising for those keen on Assassin’s Creed but not.

Nathan

This month I roleplay being less of a sh*t c**t and more of a well-rounded and thoughtful gamer goblin. As this goblin celebrates the return of the lauded D&D video game series in Baldur’s Gate III, I wonder to myself, what armour class are the loyal jorts? Booty fans unite, as the masters of top-down stealth action Mimimi Games return for the supernatural stealth pirate game Shadow Gambit: The Cursed Crew. If that doesn’t grab your arse, then the video game adaptation of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre will surely soil it. 

Scene change. I used to have a neighbour who would scream at passers-by that he would “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” them, as though it wasn’t a film title but a wrestling move or worse. In other unsettled episodes, he would claim to be God reincarnate… Blasphemous 2 is coming out. And if you need some more colour and style in your gaming rotation, keep an eye out for these titles on the August horizon. Sea of Stars will be coming to the PlayStation Plus catalogue on day one, a 16-bit JRPG inspired indie with a gorgeous presentation. Also striking a chord with its notable visuals and style is Bomb Rush Cyberpunk, the hotly awaited spiritual successor to the Jet Set graffiti skating series. And last but not least, the new expansion for Guild Wars 2, Secrets Of The Obscure. I have no idea what this expansion entails, I simply want a milestone occasion to pull me back into that neat world. 

Adam

August is usually a pretty busy social month for me, with my partner’s birthday and a few other engagements chucked in for good measure. Will that stop me from playing new releases, though? Yeah, probably. But I’ll still give playing them a good college try.

It pains me to say, but I haven’t played an in-person game of D&D for years now, and I’ve really had the itch lately. Living away from more friends, it’s become all but impossible to run a campaign where we roll dice and swear at each other, so we’ve decided to move the revelry over to Baldur’s Gate III. A deep, involved RPG that gives you the keys to the creation kingdom that can be played with friends is exactly what the alchemist ordered.

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Rounding out my trilogy of completely unrelated games is WrestleQuest, a turn-based RPG that swaps out swords and shields for powerbombs and DDTs. Featuring real-world wrestling legends like Randy Savage, Junkyard Dog and Jeff Jarrett, and a pixel art style, I’m hoping that WrestleQuest can complete my holy trinity of wrestling games in 2023, alongside WWE 2K23 and AEW: Fight Forever.

There’s no chance I’ll get to them, but I do plan on checking out Moving Out 2 and Texas Chainsaw Massacre, if only to see Ash go hog wild on survivors as Leatherface.

What games are you keen for in August? Does time’s endless march fill you with feelings you can only sufficiently ignore by playing those same games? Let us know in the comments or on social media.

Written By WellPlayed

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